Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Back by popular demand

I got a Facebook wall post today requesting that I start posting again- so here I am. I have resolved to do better even if I'm not feeling well physically, because 1. I can do this job in my PJ's and 2. I love you guys! I so enjoy my readership here and I am excited for what 2010 holds for The Pink Teapot.

Tonight I just want to write a small reminder about apologies. We had an incident today in our home (there are a lot of those with four ladies in the house) and this incident required an apology on the part of one of my children. I encouraged her to seek out the other individual, apologize, and then take the necessary steps to correct what she had done to the best of her ability (sometimes we can't fix what we've broken, darn it!)- She did take my advice and has gone the extra mile with notes intended and gifts planned.

My husband made a good comment that I thought I'd leave with you all: After I had suggested that she take some of her hard-earned babysitting money and buy a gift for the offended party, my lover said that we ought to be careful in buying gifts to say "I'm sorry" and expect that the gift is the apology, rather than the amended behavior or what have you. I thought it was a good point; although I love giving gifts for any reason, it's always good to remember that making things right is more important than flowers (but not chocolate- lets be clear).

I hope my girls learn the hard lessons the "easy way" if that's possible for them- I hate knowing that they are facing all of these tough situations, awkward pauses, curt smiles, back-biting, and all the other fun things that come along with becoming a woman. I can only hope that one piece of their moral armor that I place on their bodies every day is good manners.

Happy New Year everyone- it's gonna be fantastic!

5 comments:

Training Connection said...

Wow. Good point. We cannot buy back favor we lose. Sometimes, we will have to just make up for it with extra effort that doesn't cost anything but time.

Also, its a good habit not to go overboard with apologies but to match the issue the fair amount of remorse. It only gets worse if the other party thinks now they have greater incentive to be sensitive.

People skills costs much less than insecurity.

Janine said...

Dear "Training Connection",

I have enjoyed reading your comments and would like to have a private conversation with you via email to further discuss The Pink Teapot and to get to know you as a reader better. If you are interested in emailing me, I'd be glad to hear from you at thepinkteapot@gmail.com

Thank you for your comments and please know that I appreciate them.

Janine

Nicol said...

You have to start young to teach a child to apologize. I have a 2 1/2 yr old and for the past year we have really emphasized her to apologize for her actions.

Recently she now says I'm sorry for everything including bumping into the walls. My husband tells her that she doesn't have to say I'm sorry for that. I feel that I rather have her apologize for everything then nothing at all.

I'm grateful that when she does hurt someone she is quick to tell them I'm sorry and usually a hug.

The Fickle Nickle said...

I find it quite hard to teach a child what it means to be 'sorry'. I have taught my daughter to always use those words if she has done something wrong, but sometimes I think kids say 'Sorry' carelessly so they aren't in trouble anymore. I now make an extra effort to explain what it is like to be in the other persons shoes, so she can truly grasp the intention of what and happened and apologize meaningfully.

It is hard being a mom sometimes!! I love your blog...keep it up:)

-Nicole
TheFickleNickle.com

magnoliasntea said...

I saw your button on another blog and knew I had to visit here, and I found it a lovely respite. Thank you for such a nice place to entertain gentle reminders of good and pleasant manners.

 
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