Wednesday, July 30, 2008

My best friend's wedding

An invitation to a wedding is an honor. Every guest should behave in a way that will make the day happy for everyone-an obligation that actually begins with the arrival of the invitation.

  1. When you receive an invitation, respond promptly if there is an RSVP response card (as we discussed on Monday).
  2. The gift isn't about what you buy; it's not a competition. Give a gift that you believe will make the couple happy, if you are married, perhaps something you were grateful to receive. Some of the best gifts I received were hand made blankets that I still have.
    • You don't have to choose something from the bridal registry.
    • You don't have to spend a certain amount.
    • It's not tacky to send money-usually greatly appreciated.
    • You should always send a wedding gift either before the wedding or as soon as possible afterward. You do not have a year to send a wedding gift, a common myth.
    • You must rely on a thank you note to ensure that your gift has arrived, or you may track your package if you send the gift.
    • After three months- you may ask the couple if they received your gift if you haven't received a thank-you note.
  3. No guest should dress in a manner that will outshine the bride or groom-this includes revealing clothing for women and red is never acceptable unless you are in the wedding party and the bride's color is red. You may wear white-With Caution- although personally I would stay away from this color as it does detract from the bride.
Clothing Faux Pas:
    • Revealing clothing
    • Costumes- except when you've been asked to dress in a certain manner to reflect the wedding theme.
    • Blue Jeans-unless the wedding party will be in jeans as well.
    • Any jewelry or symbols of another faith worn to a religious ceremony.
    • Baseball hats or caps
    • Casual shorts or boots.
    • Sunglasses worn indoors (except for legitimate medical reasons).
At the reception:
    • Move quickly through the receiving line if there is one.
    • If there is no receiving line, make sure to greet the couple and their family at some point.
    • As you socialize, introduce yourself to guests you don't know.
    • Never move place cards
    • Be gracious to the guests seated at your table, be sure everyone is introduced.
    • Pay attention to the needs of elderly or infirm guests.
    • If asked to make a toast, keep it brief and clean
    • Participate in activities if you are able.
    • Don't overwhelm the DJ or Band with requests
    • Don't take centerpieces or favors that are not clearly marked as yours. If the host gives you a centerpiece, take it only after the table has been cleared.
Remember that this day is for the bride and groom. If there are situations that are uncomfortable for you, try your best to set them aside and remember for whom you are celebrating. If we think about them and their day, and less about ourselves, we're more likely to naturally follow the guidelines above, helping to ensure that this will be a day for them to remember for the rest of their lives.

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