Friday, April 20, 2012

Observations-Fancy Friday

As an etiquette blogger (and a lover of all things manners), I find myself more keenly aware of those around me;  Not in trying to be the manners police or make others feel badly, but just as an observer.
I like to point out when others around me use good manners, especially children.

I heard a 'thank you' the other day from someone who has a difficult time expressing that sentiment.  I was so excited to hear those two simple words, that I stopped, turned around, and said, "thank you for saying thank you-what nice manners".  I was so thrilled to have heard this and didn't expect to hear it again, but hoped I would.  In pointing out the good that others do, we reinforce positive behavior.  I am a believer that you'll find what you're looking for...so look for the good and you'll find it.

My two cents

2 comments:

Natalie Jane said...

I have a good friend who is having a hard time and I like to give her gifts as to cheer her up. Is is strange that all she every says is a passing "Thanks"? I think that the art of being sincerely gracious when receiving a gift is lost.

Janine said...

Natalie-

I whole heartedly agree with you. It also sounds, however, that your friend may be going through a time in her life where she isn't capable of being aware of those around her as she should. I'm not excusing poor manners, but if the goal is to help those around us feel comfortable, and it sounds like you know how to do that- try giving her the benefit of the doubt as she struggles and perhaps if it bothers you that much, the next time she says a passing, "thank you"- acknowledge that gratitude and make a big deal out of it...how much it means to you that she would say thank you. Again, I'm a firm believer that you'll find what you're looking for and if you look for opportunities to let her know how much that gratitude means to you...you might be pleasantly surprised that she remembers to give that thanks more freely next time. Then again, perhaps not; but either way, you're exhibiting good manners and and grace. Continue along that path and you will find rewards that you never thought would come your way as a result of behaving well.

Good luck!

 
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